The Art of Courtly Love

The Eighth Dialogue is between a higher nobleman and a woman of the same class. Andreas advises using “soft and gentle words” to avoid being scolded since higher noblewomen are “very ready and bold in censuring” a higher nobleman’s words and deeds and enjoy opportunities “to ridicule him” (107).

The man begins with deferential flattery, emphasizing love as “the cause and origin of everything good” (108). He urges the woman not to reject love since through it women provide an essential service to humanity. The woman retorts that she knows women’s responsibilities but argues that love creates torment and offends God. Citing the Christian gospels, the man counters that since love leads to so many positive outcomes, it cannot be a sin. Citing the Proverbs, the woman tells the man to let his deeds speak for him instead of his tongue and insults his clothing. The man cautions the woman that she seems shallow, which impugns her character. Nevertheless, he “demand[s] urgently” (114) for her love.

The woman agrees that loving wisely is praiseworthy, but her “hidden griefs” (114) prevent her from loving him. Unclear of what her specific griefs are, the man debunks her excuse on the basis that love purges grief and restores joy.